Retreat Group

I find it hard, as the days pass here, to find the time and space to write out my feelings and thought processes. For those of you who know me and what a journaler I am, you will appreciate the fact that I am on my fifth journal (thanks Dawnie for #5!) and the entries keep getting longer and longer as more and more of my life spills out into the open cracks of this country. I will try to relay a few of the larger incidents of the past week.

This past week I had my first retreat group and God was there. It was awsome to spend an entire week with Manhattan College, and I was surprised by the sadness that I felt when I had to take them to the airport to say goodbye. One night for dinner they asked everyone to think of one word that described where they were at in the week, and instantly the word REVIVED came to mind. The group was freshing, they reminded me of all the reasons I first came down here, and lent me the energy to be passionate again at the challenges that overtime had become more and more cloudy. They reawoke my passion for sharing reflections and more importantly, sharing deep thoughts about God and His role in our world and lives. They were truly a blessing to me and they reminded me of all the good people that exist in the world and who are fighting to make it better. They were a little slice of America to me, and they truly left an impact on me that they will likely never know.

One of the conversations that we had during our nightime reflection was a discussion about simplicity and what it means in our lives. I want to share one of the thoughts I had during the day as I prayed about what direction to take the group in.

As I thought about simplicty immediatley materialism came to mind and I imagined myself cleaning my closet at home. But one of the things that I have learned in being here is that everything external, or materialistic, is really only a symton of something much deeper within ourselves. Simplicity is the cleaning of our hearts, to make room for the things that really matter. It requires that we take inventory of whats in there, and take everything out that doesn´t align with our purpose or beliefs. Simplicty means making space for God to dwell in us, to clear out all the garbage that we believe and try to follow. The bible verse, ¨You cannot serve both God and money¨ came to mind while I was processing this, and for myself I decided that my greatest struggle is not with money, but with seeing myself as number one. I cannot serve both God and Colie, and perphaps that is where the most complexity has come for me in trying to have a lifestyle of simplicty. This means dumping out all of my desires, letting go of all control in my life, emptying out vain wishes and goals and consciously placing Christ in the center of my life. Simplicty is, above all things, a state of being, and the best place to start is in the heart.

With this mindset I have been trying to discern the will of God for my next step in life, how I can keep Him in the center of my life. Please pray for me as I move into the second half of the year. as I discern and pray about where He will call me to next. Being with the retreat group has opened up my heart to the possiblity of doing campus ministry, so I would ask that you would pray for me in that, to trust that God has a plan if that is where I am called.

Pray for the kids here, the hospital, the neighbors as we enter rainy season, and all the retreatants who are going home to live out all the things that they found here; namely love.

I pray that your days are finding you well, and that the spirit of love in dwelling rich within you.

Enjoy the snow for me, it is the one thing I have not found worthy of missing.