November

W explains a part of Ecuador to Melissa and Tracy

So this past week Tracy and I gave a presentation on the benefits of breastfeeding at work and afterwards headed off to don W´s house to visit him. When we arrived he wasnt there so we sat and talked to his mom and learned how to make another yummy dish out of plantanes where it is basically this massive plantane ball that you eat... super yummy and yet ANOTHER great plantane dish! Nobody steal my idea, but I think i will just open up a plantane restaurant back in the USA to sell all of these awesome dishes made out of plantanes! :) When W came home we got to talking about how he has been helping his lawyer friends out with some cases and he explained a case to us that really opened ones eyes to the difficulties of corruption. His lawyer friend is a defense lawyer for a case where a guy got caught with drugs... aparently there is a certain amount of drugs a person can have on them and once it is over that weight then is when you can get in trouble. Well, long story short, the guy with the drugs says that the police put the drugs on him. W used to be a police officer and said that that is actually a very common thing that happens with the police officers. It was just so interesting and frustrating to learn all about this. W was super patient with us and was very willing to answer all of our questions about the Ecuadorian politics.... ok so my write up about this might sound boring... but really it was very interesting and a great conversation.

OH! So towards the end of that conversation Tracy and I were talking about saftey in Ecuador and it was really touching to hear W say that he prays for us very often and thanks God for our friendship. I cant describe the feeling that gave me but it was something that warmed me inside and and left me feeling almost overwhelmed by how blessed I am.

Comedor (soup kitchen) Friends

So things have been really busy at the soup kitchen lately.

I go straight there after I am done with work at the clinic everyday and it is a really rewarding part of my day. One thing I love so much is that as I walk in the doors of the little soccer court that is in front of the comedor I hear my name called out from all over and then get nearly tackled by a circle of BEAUTIFUL kids that come and give me a kiss on my cheek!! I LOVE KIDS !!! After that happens I seriously just want to jump up and give a lil shout for joy but I know it would scare a few people ---haha.

I have been trying to spend more time talking with the people that come to eat before we serve the food... I know there is a much greater emphasis at many soup kitchens back home on talking with the people there and getting to know them and understand them... hear their story. So that is what I have been trying to here in Ecuador. I sat down the other day and talked with a very nice and caring older woman with white hair... I had noticed that she was not there for a couple of days and she explained to me that she had been sick. She then explained how she lives all alone and how none of her kids check on her any more or maintain contact with her. So when she is sick, nobody knows. Later in the conversation I learned that she lives fairly close to my house and so I told her that I would like to stop by and visit sometime. The following week I left the soup kitchen with her (which means i didnt help do dishes...) and went to her house. Maria Avela lives in a situation like the majority of the people here in Duran. Dirt floor, no water. Some of her walls were old wood, others cane and she had metal over it all as a roof. She kept on telling me how this is all she has but that i am welcome to come over any time-¨if the padlock isnt on the door then I am here¨is what she would say. She invited me to come in and sit on her bed in a very small small room and she showed me her box of clothes that she keeps so that she can sew them to different sizes and sell them because that is the only way she can make money. The day before she had sold a dress and with that money had bought a jug of clean water to drink ( drinking the water here is dangerous). In one corner of the room she had a lil wooden shelf . That corner was covered with pictures of Jesus, crosses, saints, and rosary beads. She explained that that is where she prays every day when she wakes up, before she leaves the house and when she goes to bed. She then pulled out an old photo album and showed me pictures of all of her kids and her husbands funeral announcement. She began to cry as she explained to me that she has 10 kids and none of them have even talked to her in years. She said that they used to call a neighbors cell phone and then sometimes talk to her but that hasnt happended for a while. (NOTE- people have cell phones but not because they are rich... they are the phones like you can buy at target and put minutes on with a phone card... and they are used because hardly anybody can afford a landline) Talking with Maria was so hard because it was such reminder of the extreme difficulty so so many people live with here... true poverty... it left me feeling hurt but I know that was good. Even though what I really want to give Maria is a nice place to live and plenty of food to eat ( like everyone here) I know that I cant but I do want to make sure to give her what I Can - I want to give her my time and friendship and help her to know what a beautiful person she is and see God in her. I will actually be walking over to her place today and hopefully introducing her to someone from my house. The little time with Maria really helped me to remember to think more about the situations that our kids at Valdivia come from and be more patient with them.

As I said earlier, I have been getting know the kids at the comedor too. Several of them come to Valdivia everyday so I know them really well. One little girl, Tabatha, gives the absolute BEST kisses on the cheek. She tells everyone that she is my sister so as I bring the kids their food they will ask me if its true and I just smile and say yes and then we all laugh. So our lil joke there is that Tabatha, who is 4, is my sister. :) I have decided that I want to teach my kids to give people kisses on the cheek so that they can brighten peoples day the way they do mine here.

First Communion
So the ladies at the Comedor invited us to come and help last saturday with preparing the food for the First communion. We were really excited to help with this because this was a special first communion of kids from the comedor and some of the kids were also Valdivia kids. So Karen and I went ot the comedor at 8 am on Saturday and helped prepare chicken salad sandwhiches and hotdogs and then we asked if we could sneak out for a bit to watch parts of the mass. SO we went into the church and saw all of the kids dressed so cute and we just looked at eachother with faces of excitement and like proud parents. I really felt like a mom... i was so happy for them, so proud of them, and i just about wanted to cry. 2 of our kids actually got baptized too so it was SO Incredibly touching and exciting! We got right up front and were taking pictures like moms too.
Karen is good about posting those so I will have to get them from here but i just wanted to share another exciting day in Ecuador.

Valdivia After School Program
So our Valdivia program has been going really well and we have been getting more and more kids. This week we had about 30-35 kids each day. Another thing I love about Valdivia.... kids! (Which is good consider that is what Valdivia is all about... right??)
I just sit back at different times during the time there and think to myself what wonderful kids these are and how I want the world for them!
Last friday we had the 3 different after school programs get together for a soccer tournament. So all last week during our free time we had our kids playing soccer (which is actually results in a lot of whining and requires a daily pep talk for some of our kids because so many of them love playing basketball instead). Considering this, we had many of our kids on a cheer squad and so during free time they made signs and cheers instead of practcing their soccer skills.
Oh! and by the way, Valdivia is super crafty! So Karen and I have been saving all of these nutrigrain granola bar boxes from the Soup kitchen (they got a huge donation and have been giving people them as they leave) so we have been creatively using these boxes in our valdivia activities. Andrew, another volunteer, was very creative and thought to use the boxes to make the kids jerseys to tape on to their shirts for the game. SO, lets just say that our kids definitely had the coolest most chevere uniforms at the tournament!!. :)
So we met Friday and had 29 people with us after taping the cardboard jerseys to the kids shirts, we all hopped on a bus and went over to the Arbolito community´s sweet soccer court that has a roof which is great because that means SHADE!
Lets just say Karen,Andrew, and I were all super pumped to bring our kids there but we were pretty sure that we would be bringing home the 3rd place pop-bottle trophey that our kids had made and not one of the 1st or 2nd place pop-bottle tropheys :)
Well lets just say that it was some super intense games that had me screaming out cheers until I nearly lost my voice and jumping and running all over the place cheering my kids on!
I was SO proud to see our kids playing so well... they werent fighting, pushing, complaining or anything!!! All of our pep talks about kindness and fairness duriing the week must have actually sank in!!! IT was AWESOME!!!
BUT!!!!! waht makes it even more awesome is that somehow our kids WON!!!!!!!! Both of the big kid games were won by team Valdivia!!! YIPPIE!!!
I left that day feeling super proud of our kids and just super filled with happiness.
The kids we work with are truly amazing and such blessings from God!

One thing that I would like to ask of all of you reading this is to please keep the kids in Valdivia and all of the afterschool programs and just in Duran in your prayers. They all live in very difficult situations and so many are malnourished and hungry for both food and so much more.
We are actually trying to gather kids vitamins to give to the kids at our afterschool programs.
SO if anyone would like to donate any or would know of any more sustainable ideas for vitamin donations please message me or drop me an email at melissaviaene@gmail.com

A Weekend to Remember

After more than 3 months (I can barely believe its been that long!) my life is starting to settle. I am definitely not in the honeymoon phase anymore - the kids are used to me, Im nothing new, so now we are trying to learn each other better. In both of my jobs I feel like Ive moved out of survival mode and into a more confident and critical space concerning the places where I work, the jobs Im supposed to be doing, and how I can be better for my kids and coworkers. That means that weve started to change some things. Ive changed my methods personally . . . just the way I approach all of these boys is constantly changing, and especially at Semillas we are trying to find our own ways, trying to help the program grow outside of what was left to us. I hope that came out right --- we were left a great program and some awesome kids, but its time now for us to do a little tweeking.

Enough of that. Lets talk about my last weekend and how it was the best weekend Ive had here, and it is fair also to say it was the best Ive had in a long time. Lets start with Friday. Every Friday instead of going to our morning jobs, all of the volunteers who run afterschool programs meet . . . for between 3 and 4 hours. Right, it sounds intense, and it is, but it is so important for us to sit and talk about our programs so we can plan better and be better for our kids. This specific meeting surrounded for the most part planning for the first program-wide soccer tournament of our year. It was hosted at Semillas de Mostaza and around 20 kids from our other two programs (Valdivia and Manos Abiertas) came for the event. As volunteers we planned a ton --- we were ready for anything. The Semillas kids were pumped all week and the day finally came. Now, the kids from the other two programs were not as excited about a day of soccer. Apparently in the past Semillas has had some pretty hard hitters and so there was a lot of crushed spirits coming in. But you never would have been able to tell. All of the kids were so well behaved, were cheering each other on during the games, and were truly having fun. Manos Abiertas ended up taking 1st place . . . and well just say that they came in the underdogs, so the justice there is pretty cool. Valdivia took 2nd place - which was mighty impressive considering they are not, as a group, particularly fond of soccer. And then there was Semillas. Semillas didnt win a single game (out of 6) . . . but I could not have been any prouder of our kids. They lost with dignity. They were disappointed, of course, but they still cheered, they didnt make a big deal about third place, and they didnt let it ruin their day. They were so kind and sportsmanlike . . . like I said, I was glowing with pride.

That night, all of us along with the Ecuadorian volunteers who work with the programs had a huge dinner to celebrate the event, our 3 months here, and each other. The food was great, company even better. It felt like home sitting around a table, laughing, talking, joking in Spanish. The night ended with a sing-a-long --- guitar included . . . and I felt complete. I had missed that kind of thing in my life - that was to relax and enjoy time with friends. For all of my Casamates - we sang La Bamba and Twist and Shout --- you were all in my heart and I missed you a lot in those moments. All in all a perfect Friday.

Saturday was a whirlwind. I spent the whole morning and most of the afternoon at Jenny´s house - one of our neighbors. I helped her boys with homework, played, ate lunch, and talked with the whole family. One of my favorite parts about this neighborhood and my place in it is our ability to walk into someones home and feel truly welcomed. After my morning with Jenny I headed out again with the other ladies in the house to a party for a First Communion. It was held at Kíka´s house --- one of our more outgoing and hilarious neighbors. The party was a lot of dancing, lots of yelling and teasing the gringas, and so much laughter. That night, we also went to see James Bond in the theaters --- first night out of the house in a long time. If you are thinking of seeing it, I would encourage you to wait until the DVD, which magically I can actually buy right now in Ecuador. Oh, how I love pirated DVDs.

But my weekend doesnt end there. Sunday was also a huge day. So the older boys at my morning work site at Chicos de la Calle have a soccer team. The boys are technically in high school and are high school aged and like every boy in Ecuador are obsessed with soccer. And actually, they are really good. This weekend, they played in the city wide finals. I was there to watch them win the title. Remember that pride I talked about? Well, there it was again. We had quite a cheering section for them --- some of the other volunteers at the shelter were there along with a bunch of the boys. The team has a few rehearsed cheers that we all were screaming at the top of our lungs. For a while we were quiet, the first goal wasnt scored until the second half . . . by the other team. Oh, my heart was breaking thinking that they might not pull out the win. Well, they werent having any of that, and within five minutes Chicos scored a goal. To say that we got loud would be an understatement. We exploded. The kids on the field were so excited, trying to get us to be louder. Another two minutes later they scored their second goal. And we did not stop yelling. When the ref finally blew the whistle the kids went crazy. It brought me back to high school . . . which feels sometimes like a long time ago. But I just got to thinking that these are their glory days. When they are old and have their own kids, they are going to tell them all about the time they won the Guayaquil City Championship with their friends. Oh man, I was so excited for them and so glad that I could be there.

Gosh, I wish I had more profound things to say here. I dont have many insights or any wisdom to close this out. I have no comments about social structures, or personal struggles to share now. I could try to come up with something, but I think I just want to leave this with a statement. Its simple, not anything really outstanding to read. But here it is. Honesty for the world to read. I am happy. Yes, its true. I am happy. This weekend helped to me see what is right in front of me every day of my life in Ecuador. Its easy to see other things too - to see the hard stuff, to see the stuff that is missing, but this weekend I got to see everything that is good about where I am and what Im trying to do. I saw kids having good fun; I spent time talking, eating, singing, dancing with my neighbors; I saw kids that I love win the biggest soccer game of their lives. What blessings I have. How lucky I am to be here. The trick is looking for all of this and remembering it when the days are rougher - when my kids dont listen, when they fail my class, when I feel far away from home, when I let myself believe that I am not doing a good job. So that is the challenge in the year - to find the things that make me smile - to see the beauty that is right there in front of me and to choose to let that fill me. And oh, how it does fill me.

Sensation

Life looks like...

children in school uniforms; beat up and ripped soccer balls; brightly painted canchas (paved soccer fields) and schools; acres of cane houses strewn among swampy standing water and dirt roads; cattle, chickens, and mangled stray dogs; smoke rising from piles of burning trash; dark skinned, dark eyed Ecuadorian faces; kids running toward you with open arms about to hug you; sunsets that set the world on fire; Manos kids walking down the dirt roads back to their cane homes at 5pm with the glow of the pre-setting sun sanctifying them; broken crayons and eraser-less pencils; cursive handwriting; unsuccessful attempts at copying letters by kids who unjustly have been given up on by Ecua-education; students in blue polo shirts at Santiago; pregnant girls and women; very small babies being help by their mothers; people of all ages selling things on buses and on the streets; constant dust in the house blown in from the streets; torn, misfitted clothing; cheap jewelry and tacky tight shirts; tiny black sandals with rainbow straps worn nearly every kid; blue cane church in 28 de Agosto; graph paper; multiplication table on the back of notebooks

Life feels like...

small hands holding mine; tiny underweight children hanging onto you wanting to be carried and held; bumpy bus rides and metal seats; cold showers; never really feeling clean; the unique stomachache and intestinal problems that can only be caused by parasites and worms dying inside of you; scorching heat and sweating all over; sitting in tiny kid chairs at Manos; getting hit in the face with a soccer ball; people leaning against you on the morning busride to work; dirty hands and dirty ankles; breeze from a ceiling fan; hugs from community mates; kiss on the cheek to greet people; plastic chairs; the lack of softness of clothes that are hung to dry

Life smells like...

burning trash; amazing cooking; unbathed children; bleach and dish soap; banana bread in the oven; laundry detergent; gasoline and exhaust; lunch preparations at Santiago; port-a-potty smell on the street corner of Santiago

Life sounds like...

kids laughter; 30 seconds of silence at Manos; rolled r´s and Spanish everything; constant latin music flowing through the streets; ¡mano! during soccer games; buses and cars passing; ¡hola niña!¿cómo estás?; my own stumbling through Spanish; in dept conversations about the pillars and mission of RdC; awkward silences when visiting neighbors; ¡elisa!; señoriiiiita, ayudameeeee; a constant whiny tone of voice that is a cultural norm yet still vaguely annoying; young adults singing and playing guitar at mass; the horrendous Barney song in Spanish played by ice cream trucks passing by

Life tastes like...

room temperature water; rice & beans; fried plantains; juicy, fresh pineapple; lentils; green peppers, tomatos, and onions; lime; hot, sweet, fresh bread; lemon lime popsicles for 5 cents in 28 de Agosto; listerine; bananas; instant coffee; honey tea; cinnamon and brown sugar in oatmeal